How to be Present on Your Wedding Day
Having an Intentional and Memorable Day

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For so many couples wedding day is a blur– all of the planning, organizing and then whoosh. It’s over in the blink of the eye. Here are some tips for how to be fully present on your wedding day so you can enjoy and remember such a special day.

Set Expectations and Delegate

Delegation is key for enjoying a blissfully naive wedding day. Come wedding day your decision making should be over, let your vendors take care of you and run the ship while you get to just relax and enjoy the day. This takes careful planning and setting of expectations. Make sure your family and wedding party knows who to go for in the event of questions or issues. You and your partner are not to be bothered!

Schedule in breaks and wiggle room

This is one of my top priorities when creating timelines for my couples. 90% of weddings something goes slightly awry. With that in mind, make sure you have wiggle room in your timeline in case hair and makeup takes longer than expected or you can’t find Uncle Bob during family photos. When you have that little bit of cushion time you don’t have to stress about being behind or rushed on your day.

And make sure you schedule time for you and your partner to actually relax and spend time with one another. Most timelines are just go go go. But give yourselves some private alone time to reflect on the day.

Keep your morning routine

Your morning will greatly shape the tone of the whole day. If you are a brew a cup of coffee and read kinda person, do that. If you are a start the day with some yogo, schedule that in. If you are a “I’ll be grumpy unless I get 8 hours of sleep” human, make sure you get your rest!

Prioritize moving slowly and intentionally in the morning. If you start off frantic and stressed that energy will carry with you throughout the day.

Turn off your phone

One thing I ask in my wedding questionnaire is for the phone numbers of someone who will be with you and your partner most of wedding day. Usually this a member of your wedding party. This way you can turn off your phone and focus on being present and still ensuring your vendors can contact you if need be.

I know it’s been a popular tip on Tik Tok and blogs to have someone in your wedding party document your day, but HOT TAKE, have the people around you unplug as well. Prioritize your experience over having every single thing documented. If people are snapping photos of you 24/7 you’re going to be taken out of the moment every single time.

Practice this grounding exercise often

My therapist friend taught me this exercise, it’s called the 5-4-3-2-1 coping technique and it’s used when you have anxiety as a way of grounding you in the present.

This is something I’ve started doing not only when I’m anxious, but also when there’s something I really want to remember.

Here’s the gist:

5: Acknowledge FIVE things you see around you. Your parents’ grins, your gorgeous florals, the sun on your partner’s face, your best friends smile, etc.

4: Acknowledge FOUR things you can touch around you. Your florals, your partners touch, etc.

3: Acknowledge THREE things you hear. This could be any external sound. Your guests voices, your wedding processional music, your officiants voice, your best friends laughter, the birds chirping.

2: Acknowledge TWO things you can smell. Your perfume (side note: scent is one of the most powerful memory tools. I highly recommend you and your partner selecting a wedding fragrance that will help bring you back to this moment!)

1: Acknowledge ONE thing you can taste. This one’s a little weird, but could be your wedding cake lol?

Obviously you don’t have to do this precisely, but by honing in on all 5 senses you’ll be able to take mental snapshots throughout the day that will both allow you to be present and solidify your memories of the day.

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